It's All About Bertie Mabootoo

January stats

2012-02-01T16:34:00.001+11:00

Books read - 10
DVD movies watched - 27
Distance walked - 60km
Drawings done - 0

I've been monitoring my action count since October 2006, but only last month realised that it wasn't very useful to measure without setting targets. So last month I identified the actions I wanted to emphasise, and ended up achieving 92% of my overall target (147/160). While I didn't draw as planned, I did more reading and walking, which balanced things out.

I've upped my drawing target for Feb to keep me looking at that as something needing more focus. I'm still far from settled on the right mix of walking to resting, as the second half of Jan was quite the fatigue-y struggle, and today has been far from encouraging. Oh well, 11 months left to work things out :)

Fly

2012-01-21T10:36:00.002+11:00

After buying some new walking shoes on Thu, finally got a chance to christen them this morning, with immediate positive results. Actually got my walking speed back up over 6kph (for a 3k walk) after it'd been hovering at 5.6kph (must've been walking kinda dainty). And my knees and ankles feel fine! Surely this can only help maintain my walking enthusiasm :)

Broken!

2012-01-15T19:17:00.000+11:00

The fruits of my labours so far, records for all my walking metrics :) And I'm less than halfway through the month! Of course I have to spend the remainder of my days resting, so hopefully it'll take a smaller percentage of my energy to maintain this over time...

Build

2012-01-10T22:48:00.001+11:00

My focus the past week or so has been almost exclusively on building up my walking capacity, which has paid off nicely. 12 walks in the last 14 days including a couple of full hour-long efforts. While I've been sore, I haven't been fatigued, so must be doing something right :)

Another week or so of this and I can start to shift my attention to something else on my long todo list, with a base of strength to build from!

Week 1

2011-12-30T22:11:00.001+11:00

Amazingly, I've only been on holidays for a week but it already feels like a month away from work. Which is a good thing, given the legitimate concern that a year off will fly by all too quickly.

So, what do I have to show for this strangely stretched time?

Firstly, a return to walking (although still a bit of a struggle) and weights (very light, but a start).

Secondly, some drawing. Well, ok, one drawing... But it's my first in 2 months and so I have to rebuild a routine.

Thirdly, lots of time with family, with Christmas gatherings spread across 2 days plus my usual Thursday dinner.

Fourthly, reading, with 2 more finished books taking me to 70 for the year. Not the 100 I was on track for back in April, but a step ahead of last year, which was an increase on the year before that. Perhaps 2012 will see a century...

Fifthly, some DVD watching. I'm still working out where I'll draw the line between relaxing in front of the tv and doing more constructive things. Overthinking it threatens to suck the life out of me, so I'm just going by feel for now.

Finally, I've written this post, a rare occurrence indeed! Hopefully there'll be more to come.

When I write it up like that, I can convince myself I've been much busier than I really have :) Lots more to do though!

Why a PM?

2011-10-14T17:50:00.000+11:00

Here's a little taste of the kind of thought that sit in my head, and explains why even the briefest taste of "news" both drains me and makes me want to scream...

Are there any compelling reasons why we have a PM, and a Cabinet, which have some kind of precedence in decision making? Come to that, why do we need any aspect of an adversarial "govt vs opposition" approach? This makes a mockery of proportional representation, since all those who have voted for their local member, presumably on the basis that he or she represents local interests most effectively, are left without any kind of effective voice in decision making. It also disregards members' individual expertise.

If collegiate decisions could be made by the parliament as a whole, using the entire knowledge and skills of the group, surely the results would be more representative?

There would be no need for factional fighting, for arguments over who should lead, for secrets between or within parties which weaken the collective decision making process.

Double rainbow

2011-09-29T21:56:00.001+10:00

Taken from my family's new deck this afternoon.

Bounce

2011-09-12T21:04:00.001+10:00

Got past a brief crisis of mental strength after my last post, where I stopped believing my health will improve and also had the feeling that reading books and watching DVDs was futile, no matter whether I was enjoying them or not. Always searching for something 'important' to do...

Luckily, today the sun shone on my longest walk for 6 weeks, even if it was for the dreadest of purposes - grocery shopping (gasp!). Survived ok, although the day after has usually been when the CFS hits.

Added to that, my sister lent me a handful of her recent TV-on-DVD purchases, giving me something new to watch as I eagerly wait for Fringe S3 to arrive.

First up was a mini-series, The Lost Room, which was only 4 hours long (thus just a snack) but excellent. Strong taste of Twilight Zone to it.

I've now started into Leverage S1 and after just 2 eps I'm totally sold. Fast-paced, funny and with the great helping-the-little-guy theme that makes The Pretender one of my favourite shows. Nice to know there are at least 3 more seasons after this one too.

Yep

2011-09-10T21:48:00.001+10:00

Encouraging signs today. Turns out that if I spend 15 hours in bed, and do zero exercise, the pain I've been in the past week or two fades almost completely. Ok, that's not exactly practical longer term, but it's a platform to build on.

I really need this upcoming year off, my management-speak habit seems a little out of control in that last sentence ;)

Little

2011-09-09T21:26:00.001+10:00

My road back to health continues at the opposite of apace. As soon as the bulk of my new (and thankfully temporary) symptoms eased off, good ol' CFS kicked in again, so the past week or so has been a bit of a struggle. It's been awesome to be out of bed and making my small work contributions again, though :) Also good being able to read for more than a few minutes at a time (after arrogantly trumpeting my return to books not long ago!), and walking the extreme distance of 800m every few days (with disproportionate pain and fatigue, but it's something!).

And that's why I've had nothing to write! Does the above at least sound moderately positive amongst the frustration? I hope so :)

Reading again

2011-07-22T22:44:00.002+10:00

After the complete stall in reading that was May and June, putting a very large dent in my 100 book plan for the year, I've finally regained momentum. Over the past 4 days I've finished off 3 novels, and started into a 4th :) It's nice to have the ability to concentrate for more than 15 minutes at a time again!

Told me so

2011-07-05T22:03:00.000+10:00

I seem to have bounced back ok from the cold that hit me almost immediately after I wrote that last post... Coincidence sure does make it hard to stave off superstition! On the plus side, since I had to rest the last few days anyway, at least the weather was ordinary and I didn't feel like I was missing out on anything :)

Today I let my team and my key clients know of my plans to take 2012 off, so the wheels are really starting to accelerate towards my "Year of Adventure"! (Disclaimer: Adventure not guaranteed.)

10

2011-07-02T22:28:00.000+10:00

Almost didn't write this, then realised it was just my superstition about writing positive stuff getting in the way of shelling out more good news health-wise.

Today was my 10th walk in a row, as well as being my longest walk for the year (4.4km in 45 minutes). The best part was that the walk felt easier as I went on, something which is definitely not the case when my fatigue is a factor. With awful weather scheduled to kick off from Monday, there's every chance I will be cutting back on the walks, but I'm hopeful that the routine I've returned to will give me the impetus to partake of some indoorsy exercise as a replacement (that exercise bike won't ride Itself!).

I have lunch plans with 2 friends already scheduled for next week, my tenants finally move out tomorrow, and I'm generally just enjoying feeling normal again :)

Complete

2011-06-29T23:06:00.000+10:00

Seven straight days with walking (roughly 16km total) and the last couple of days have actually felt good. Nice to walk for half an hour and feel like I have more in me :) I had a timorous target of returning to what used to be my usual 6km walks by the end of the year, but there seems every chance I'll manage it far sooner. Now if only I can restore my optimal sleep patterns, i.e. get more than a few 2 hour snippets a night, the sky's the limit!

Almost

2011-06-25T13:13:00.002+10:00

So begins what I hope will be a successful return to exercise. Unsure whether it's been triggered by my impatience, or that my body had finally had sufficient bedrest :)

After some light weights on Wed, I've had 3 straight lunchtime walks, with today's effort a 30 minute stroll. While that gave me a slight stitch and aggravated my various tendonitises (to be expected after such a sedentary dual-month), I didn't get hit by immediate fatigue-y symptoms. Will have to wait a few more days to really see whether I've pushed too hard...

Time passing

2011-06-15T13:07:00.016+10:00

Well, the last 6 weeks have been filled up with an average of 17 hours a day bedrest, and an inability to do any exercise. The remaining hours are taken up with my brief work week, and a couple of family meals.

Luckily for me, the spectre of depression remains unrealised. Plus the severity of my fatigue means that despite eating more than usual and rarely moving, my weight remains steady, so I won't have that burden to deal with when I can ease back to a normal walking routine.

Annoyingly, I'm struggling to read books, with the brain fog crushing my concentration (I pretty much use all my mental energy on work), so it's been a diet of podcasts and rewatched DVDs.

Thus my excuse for no updates is portrayed, and I may once more return to my repose :)

Urgh

2011-05-20T22:39:00.000+10:00

Well I've felt crappy all week, including having my second sick day of the year on Monday, but my usual Thursday dinner with family, plus today's lunch with Em and my first phone conversation of the year with B somehow make everything seem all right :)

Tomorrow I make another tentative attempt to return to exercise, after some less than positive short walks the past couple of weeks. This time it's some easygoing strength work and stretches, since apparently I'm now allergic to fresh air... Or the cold... Or whatever... ;)

Fiery sunset

2011-05-08T11:41:00.000+10:00

Civic in autumn

2011-05-04T20:10:00.000+10:00

Had a thoroughly enjoyable time hanging out with Liv this afternoon, taking photos along this wandering path:

For more pics, just check out my Flickr.

Don Quixote

2011-04-30T11:40:00.000+10:00

While I'm glad I've read this, classic as it is, it was a bit of an endurance test.

The first half in particular was very repetitive, with overlong sentences, although definitely luxuriant prose. Perhaps because my own writing consists largely of technical stuff these days, where short simple sentences are the aim, I see wordiness as a weakness?

The second half was largely written to attack another writer who had stolen the characters to write a nominal sequel, making for an interesting (although not too deeply hidden) subtext. The close felt quite rushed after so much preceding material, but I was relieved to be at the end anyway.

Books

2011-04-24T09:07:00.001+10:00

Some overdue book "reviews" from recent readings:

The Adventures of Tom Sawyer and of Huckleberry Finn
Enjoyed reading both of these again. The first, written in the third person was funnier and easier to read, but the latter, written as first person, gave a deeper and more interesting view of the time in which it was written, and the growth of a young boy, making his own choices even when they conflict with societal norms.

An indirect follow up to this was reading The Fabulous Riverboat, part of the Riverworld series, where a reincarnated Samuel Clemens (aka Mark Twain) is the main protagonist.

Bram Stoker's Dracula
Dracula had more humour in it than I expected, and the format of only using journal entries and letters was successful in keeping the story moving apace, as well as bringing multiple viewpoints to bear on the mystery (although obviously it's hard to see the outcome as a surprise given the flood of vampire lore in popular culture!).

God Emperor of Dune
The fourth in the Dune series, this was an easier read than the preceding Children of Dune, as it was more plot-driven, and somewhat less conceptual since it could build on the previous book's hard establishing work. It may also have been easier because of the volume of recent reading, certainly making me feel more confidence in my ability to concentrate for extended periods and get absorbed into the flow of a book. Looking forward to the next one!

So far

2011-04-04T10:59:00.000+10:00

The first 5-and-a-bit days of my hols have been good. I haven't magically discovered energy again, but I have done a few drawings, am about to finish off my 4th book and even dared venture into the horror of clothes shopping. It took a visit to 7 different shops (waaaay beyond my usual solo shopping tolerance) to finally find a store with any 3/4 pants at all, and thankfully Best & Less saved the day for me, fulfilling all my clothing needs, and letting me forget about shops again until sometime in May when my food next runs out :)

What? You can't believe I haven't watched any DVDs? Well, I'm successfully sticking to my don't-buy-any-more-DVDs-since-I-already-have-several-shows-on-preorder-and-heaps-to-rewatch commitment to myself, meaning that I'm now re-enjoying Lost, Seinfeld and Mythbusters when I've got nothing left to give to more active pursuits. Kicking out all my current tenants, and my plan to take 2012 off work means practise at saving money is actually useful!

Keep reading!

2011-03-27T16:33:00.001+11:00

Twenty-eight books added to my "to read" pile thanks to the Lifeline Book Fair, including the one book which was missing from my Dune hexology. Definitely need to keep my 100-book-year momentum going before my shelves again fill up, invalidating my heroic give away efforts of the past year or two!

Books books books

2011-03-09T19:04:00.000+11:00

I've avoided making a hard commitment, as is my way, but progress towards a 100-book year is steadily being made. 24 books in so far, and thoroughly enjoying recapturing the reading bug. So far I haven't really targeted anything too challenging, but as of now I'm embarking on a Dickens of an adventure (worst pun ever? You be the judge).

So far in life I've only read 2 of Dickens' works, but my goal is to read the other 18 of his novels. I do want to taste several more of the literary classics, so perhaps it won't all be complete come 2012, but it appeals to the collector in me nonetheless.

First up (technically 3rd...) is Oliver Twist, which I've never even seen a movie or musical version of (Gasp! Cultural horror!). Obviously I'm aware of the "please sir, may I have some more?" line, which turns out to be "please sir, I want some more" in any case. Either I misremember the never seen scene, or the original seemed too impolite :)

Work of art

2011-02-28T18:38:00.000+11:00

Occasionally I check to see how people are getting to my Flickr photos, and today I found that, if you look on Wikipedia under "work of art", you'll find a photo I took at the National Gallery. Of course it's not my work of art, but at least it means I can autofocus a good picture of some :)

Customer service

2011-02-28T15:56:00.000+11:00

Had two very good customer service experiences this afternoon. Firstly, I'd been having trouble with my iPhone, so called up Apple Support. Not only did I get straight through, but they identified it as a hardware problem and gave me options on how to replace the phone, one of which was a good one for me, so I have a new phone winging its way over the next few days.

The second one was a courtesy call from my credit union confirming use of my credit card for a couple of charges outside my usual usage pattern. Nice to know my money's being watched over!

Now off to do my daily mindfulness, then settle down to watch the just-arrived-this-arvo Spin City S4. Everything's coming up Milhouse... I mean Bertie :)

Useful

2011-02-27T11:18:00.000+11:00

Watching the Deep Astronomy vodcast last night reminded me of the SETI@Home project. Until recently, my computer power and internet connectivity have been entirely swallowed up just doing the things I want to do day to day. However, since I got my new machine I haven't come close to using all its CPU power, and I have internet quota to burn.

So this morning I installed the BOINC Manager, and established links with SETI@Home, as well as the World Community Grid and Einstein@Home. For the first time ever, I saw all 11 of my CPU cores at 100%, using my personal grunt for the greater good :) Now all I have to do is balance the preferences so I don't fry my computer or explode my power bill...

Up

2011-02-26T16:07:00.001+11:00

Have still needed lots of bedrest today, but ventured out for lunch and a photo stroll at the National Botanic Gardens. A little bit of sunshine and fresh air just has to be good for me :)

Brighter day

2011-02-23T15:13:00.001+11:00

Embarked on my first real exercise since Friday, a slow walk of the dogs at the edge of Lake Ginninderra. While it wrecked me, that was all the excuse I needed to go back to bed and finish off Tony Martin's Lolly Scramble, which I finally bought via Kindle the other day, after having it sitting on my book wishlist for years. Many laugh-out-loud moments throughout the book, and very glad I finally got around to reading it.

I now have Tony's other book, A Nest Of Occasionals, sitting on my iPad as my next reading target, along with Shaun Micallef's reprinted Smithereens. All part of keeping my smiley self going :)

Watts up

2011-02-22T19:59:00.000+11:00

I continue to get most of my historical and/or art knowledge from TV fiction :)

Dark Skies, having finally been released on DVD, has given me a chance to see lots of American 60's intertwined with aliens and conspiracies aplenty. My pre-early-bedtime ep this evening showed the amazing Watts Towers.

How come?

2011-02-21T19:24:00.000+11:00

My aspiration is for the new subtitle of this blog - Nothing but sunshine - to reflect a new focus. While there will still be complaining of some variety, I want to focus more on the silver lining aspects of my life. Here's my first example:

The past few days has seen my CFS flaring up, forcing me into a whole lot of bed rest. I've had muscle weakness and spasms, lots of twitches and fine motor control issues preventing me from much in the drawing space, and plenty of general aches, pain and tiredness ("Still sounds like the same old whingeing!" I hear you say...). Well, my attitude, as I'm forced to lie down long before dark, and entirely walk-less for another day, is to look forward eagerly to finishing off yet another book, perhaps rewatching some Mythbusters on DVD, and listening to my growing stockpile of podcasts, each the fallback option as my tiredness grows.

Dunno how successful that was as a piece of positive writing! Hopefully practise will improve me :)

Continued

2011-01-29T22:57:00.000+11:00

I know you just love to see stats about my walking, so here's the latest high-tech addition to my arsenal, and hopefully my secret weapon in maintaining motivation. I haven't made the route maps public for obvious reasons, but trust me when I say they add to the excitement :)

Cleanup 2011

2011-01-05T16:23:00.000+11:00

In the last couple of days I've returned to necessary steps in removing clutter from my surrounds. Last year I managed to finally relinquish my hold on the majority of my books, thanks to the lure of giving to Lifeline. This year I intend to add CDs and games to my donations, to further clear my bulging shelves.

Today I sent on their way most of my defunct electronics: a 3-in-1 stereo which had become a 0.5-in-1, my last VCR, my MiniDisc deck and a flaky DVD player, plus all my VHS and audio tapes and MiniDiscs.

I also finally threw away all my Uni notes and assignments, none of which I've referenced since the end of my degree in 1996.

Next on the list:

going through the many boxes that made the move to my house almost 13 years ago, and have remained closed ever since,
disposing of a whole second house's worth of furniture,
scanning/photographing anything I don't really need to physically hang on to and getting rid of it.

By the end of it I can only assume that the past's hold on me will be eased somewhat, giving me a little more impetus to target my thinking towards the future.

"Fine" weather

2010-12-27T20:08:00.001+11:00

My first outdoor photo with my iPhone, capturing the weather which the BOM site reported as "fine" just before I left the house. Good test of my renewed walking resolve though :) Since resting hasn't gotten me very far during 2011, I'm planning to commit as hard as I can to my limited exercise regime from here on. Hopefully it's the right approach...

Sidewise

2010-12-22T21:24:00.000+11:00

While I haven't been in bed, I've been watching some DVDs, of course :)

First, "Around the World in 80 Days" reminded me of the awesomeness of Jackie Chan, with a little bonus Arnie cameo. So many different accents in this one!

Then "The Jerk" (which I haven't seen since high school) pointed out why I love Steve Martin movies too. While not as good as "The Man With Two Brains" (what is?) it stands up really well for a movie over 30 years old.

Shopgirl and The Imaginarium of Dr Parnassus are next on the list of movies, as I keenly await Futurama S5, set to arrive in the mail early in the new year, and near the end of another enjoyable season of Mad About You (S5).

So far...

2010-12-22T21:01:00.001+11:00

Well, I've been fighting off some kind of cold/flu/virus the past few days, which is hitting me in instalments. Yesterday hit me with the worst pain I've had in ages, with nerves over my whole body burning, simply from me daring to go for a walk. Luckily spending lots of time in bed has started to improve things, and given me an excuse (since I want to look for positives) to spend more time exploring my iPad. Last night I was able to watch a doco and an ep of The Goodies via ABC iView from the comfort of my bed! And I'm lying down as I write this :)

Today I also got my iPhone 4 and it's all set up and ready to act as my all-in one device - phone, mp3 player and camera. My hope is I'll both take more photos and possibly explore a little more, in the search of something to share with my unlimited social network access. If I can only get my health back to a sufficient level, 2011 could be a far more outgoing year.

Hellz yeah!

2010-12-17T20:19:00.000+11:00

For the first time in my work and school life, I managed to make it through an entire year without a single sick day! One of the few benefits of unrelenting CFS has been my much-vaunted immunity from the everyday viruses floating around (particularly in an office environment). I now have 23 days to rest and relax before embarking on a challenging 2011 work program.

What will I do with all that time? Well, for a start, I'll be playing with my brand new toy, delivered just as I got home today, and the very device I'm composing this post on - a shiny iPad. Pretty impressed with it so far. It's partner iPhone should arrive before the year ends, and I'll have my first new phone in 8 years, full of camera/music player/lots-more-included-calls goodness :)

Merry Christmas!

Out of Canberra

2010-11-03T11:06:00.000+11:00

After 3 years with no travel, I finally managed to escape the confines of the ACT with a short trip to Malua Bay. I was able to totally relax, didn't think about work once, and had many serves of fish and chips :) Here's a little sample of the mini-holiday in pictures (full photoset here):

I was pretty disappointed to return to my humdrum normal existence yesterday, even knowing I have 5 days more off work. Could retirement to the South Coast come even earlier than planned? Not sure I can wait 8 years...

Begin again

2010-10-24T10:52:00.000+11:00

So after 3 weeks of no exercise and stupid amounts of bedrest, I've started the slow process of rebuilding my strength and fitness again (a multi-annual event anyway, so I should be used to it!). Basically I'll be easing my way back into some walking, working hard to not give in to my impatience by jumping quickly to my full hour-long walk, no matter how much I want to see the slightly farther flung parts of my neighbourhood again.

I've at least managed to wind back from 15+ hours a day in bed to a more tolerable 11.

My hope is that I can sustain some 15 minute walks most days for the next few weeks without sparking another relapse, which'll then allow me to bump up the duration of the walks. I did want to at least regain a little leg strength before spending a few days down the coast next week, and before a hectic work November tests my energy, so fingers crossed for a successful week.

A new identity

2010-10-16T19:05:00.000+11:00

If I no longer have the energy to be an overachiever, what am I? While I've (at least temporarily) found a certain I've-been-much-sicker-in-the-past-so-I'm-not-going-to-let-my-current-health-frustration-depress-me-too-much attitude, the reality is that I'm not going to be able to spend more than 20 hours a week working anytime soon, if ever again. That hard limit means that I can either be a generalist (made ineffective and underproductive by enforced multitasking) or a specialist (something which would require more passion and focus than I've achieved for ages).

Even if I can make that decision, and successfully create the right role, I'm never again going to be what work calls a "high potential" individual. I'm not going to move up the ranks of management. I'm not going to be on the critical path for any major projects. I'm not going to have a large team of people to guide the development of.

Right now I'm getting by, adding value where I can, occasionally feeling that I'm needed. But are those 20 hours spent in the office helping me to a more meaningful life, or simply sucking up the little energy I do have, preventing me from actioning more important things?

Just one of the issues I ponder in my many hours of mandatory rest!

No more dessert

2010-08-22T10:34:00.000+10:00

That'll teach me to be optimistic :( Foolish, naive past-self!

Sadly, very little of my hope turned into anything over the past few years and now, at best, all I can hope is that little won't be rolled back during whatever term a minority government of either flavour maintains.

But wait, what am I depressed about, Tony is offering us "stable, predictable and competent government"! Apparently too much to ask for innovative, sustainable, compassionate leadership... Maybe the Greens' increased presence in the Senate will rub off on the right-wing fearmongers?

Oz songstresses

2010-08-18T12:34:00.000+10:00

Brought to you by the letter S apparently...

I intentionally don't analyse the music I listen to, in order to spare myself one more thing I overthink, but I'd still like to occasionally write about it, since it forms a constant backdrop to my daily life. So here's a little something:

It probably started back in 2003, when I saw Amiel performing Obsession (I Love You) on (the sadly short-lived) Micallef Tonight. I really, really liked it, despite (or maybe because of) it having nothing in common with my punk/rap/rock mainstays. I bought Amiel's album, listened to it plenty, but didn't really go any further down the new path.

Then in 2008, Lenka released her first solo album and Kate Miller-Heidke released Curiouser, and the floodgates opened. Those two albums formed the gateway to Bertie Blackman, Elana Stone, Sarah Blasko and (with her debut album release last month) Megan Washington.

Sarah Blasko was probably the hardest for me to get into, because of the spare instrumentation in her earlier work, meaning it has to be listened to rather than just overheard. I ended up going backwards from As Day Follows Night, which allowed me to ease out of listening-to-singles-in-one-ear mode to absorbed-into-the-world-of-the-music mode.

Sometimes the strong emotional response which these artists can invoke is a bit too draining for me, other times it's energising, but either way it reassures me that I still have feelings :) Plus there's plenty of humour in their work too, which is a key factor in almost everything I enjoy.

And that's how my 180 track "Oz Songstresses" playlist was born!

Uggh

2010-08-18T11:42:00.000+10:00

As expected, writing positive things in my last post has lead to feeling pretty ordinary. Of course I'm not really that superstitious and I expect it has more to do with bad weather getting in the way of my walking schedule, and a drop in firefighting duties at work, giving me some time to do bigger picture stuff (which lacks the drive and urgency). I've started meditating again after letting my routine slip, and am hopeful that will help my mood stay at least a little upbeat through this latest health lull.

One thing that my body has still permitted me is plenty of reading. Admittedly plenty of lightweight stuff with the Roswell High series and Angel spin-off books, but still more active than glazed viewing of TV. And I'm now on to the meatier Children of Dune (3rd in a series of 6) and Stonehenge: Where Atlantis Died (which is my lunchtime read).

Wanderin'

2010-08-11T10:38:00.000+10:00

While I'm here, I've avoided being too positive about a return to significant walking over the past month. After an 8 month relapse into CFS, I've finally been able to act out my enthusiasm for the longer walks surrounding my house, which I'd missed terribly while physically incapable of reaching them in the 30 minutes max I could sporadically manage.

Spend spend spend

2010-08-11T10:26:00.000+10:00

The thought that more than 2 people would actually read these blog posts has clearly been freaking me out, leading to total cessation of writing. So I broke the auto-link setting on my Facebook profile to basically ensure almost total anonymity... and I'm back!

Last Wednesday I bought a replacement for my aged computer, which was really struggling to deal with my wish to both listen to music and read email at the same time, let alone do some digital sketching. While it took 5 solid hours of trial and error to get iTunes and my iPod to recognise my music and each other, it's now running very smoothly, and I've fought past the inevitable buyer's remorse that $4700 of tech entails.

I suppose it's exactly because I'm such a spendthrift in general that I can both afford to use that kind of cash on something (which I will definitely use a lot) and also feel somewhat ashamed that I spent any money at all. Really my brain just refuses not to overthink anything!

Progress?

2010-03-13T20:39:00.000+11:00

Well, I've successfully established a solid drawing routine again, after only sporadic efforts since last May. Around 25 hours in the past 10 days. Some of the results make an appearance on Flickr, but the rest are just steps along the way to better skillz. And all I had to do to make the time was impose a no-DVDs-before-noon rule on myself :)

Why such a rule? I just worked out that I've watched about 400 hours of DVDs across the past 4 months (27 TV seasons and 33 movies). If I actually had energy to do anything with that time other than watch DVDs, I'd feel like I was wasting my life away!

Annoyingly, my CFS continues to rebel against any attempts at physical activity. Even 15 minute walks are wrecking me right now, so I'm not even treading water fitness-wise (treading water being much too strenuous anyway...). Hopefully the stress-free environment of my April off will give me a chance to get some strength back.

Lost

2010-02-03T15:42:00.002+11:00

Nice knowing you all, I'll see you in a month or so...

Reading

2009-11-18T13:55:00.000+11:00

Just finished reading Juliet, Naked (the latest from Nick Hornby) and really enjoyed it. It was certainly a much easier read than some of the other books I've consumed recently, and I both laughed and thought while reading it, a happy combination. A very strong contrast in tone to Destination: Void by Frank Herbert, which was chock full of weighty discussion on consciousness and the process of constructing it mechanically in an AI. Also lighter than Great Expectations, which was good but hard to get into because of the archaic language. Luckily I had the South Park version at the back of my mind to ease the visualisation process ;)

Unjinx

2009-10-18T10:43:00.000+11:00

Just to prove my hopefulness of yesterday didn't jinx a return to winter...

I'd been meaning to take an ironic shot of the New Macgregor "lake" for some time, but the recurring rain was starting to make it less ironic all the time. A few weeks back there was a single puddle, and now it's grown to this astonishing waterway:

And this reminds me why I love where I live, only a short stroll and totally isolated from even the small resemblance of Canberra to a city:

The start of something?

2009-10-17T22:16:00.000+11:00

Hopefully winter is done with and I can get on with walking consistently, not complaining about my aching bones, and wearing shorts to work again!

Floriade

2009-10-10T20:39:00.000+11:00

It's been ages since I've had anything worth posting, but a rare windless day and plenty of photos gives me something eventful to show. Plenty more here if you're interested.

In my own hands

2009-06-15T16:07:00.001+10:00

The past week or so I've gained plenty of insight into the value of my regime the last year. I had obviously started to take my hard-won health somewhat for granted, and took a few liberties with my routine. The resulting key lessons:

1. three forkfuls of Indian food = 8 hours of severe stomach pain and several days of discomfort.
2. not going to bed at my usual time just once = getting slapped hard with fatigue for over a week.

Those may not sound like positive things, but what I've taken from them is the fact that my continued health is primarily determined by strict self-discipline. There are no miracle cures, or even perfectly effective drugs, for my chronic illnesses but by being a little careful, my quality of life remains high.

I still have some rebuilding to do from this latest slip, but luckily I excel at routine!

Will Wii or won't Wii?

2009-05-25T17:58:00.000+10:00

After a few days of inactivity, where I vainly hoped walking weather wasn't gone for the season ('cause I actually like walking) I summoned up my chutzpah (no, not an appropriate use of the word) and jumped back on my exercise bike yesterday. My knees managed to cope with several whole minutes and then I let discretion be my guide.

This evening I managed to drag myself away from Buffy Season 6 (no mean feat after having settled comfortably into my recliner) and boot up my Wii Fit, only to have every one of my rechargeable batteries fail me. Un(OK, marginally)deterred, I got back on the bike and doubled my Sunday effort.

Will I still be able to use my legs tomorrow? Probably, it wasn't that strenuous... oh, sorry, was that supposed to be suspenseful? Nonetheless, I hope to be yoga/stretch/stepping away on my Wii platform tomorrow, because 'tlooks like winter is here to stay, and Hamish and Andy podcasts, awesome as they are, will only get me through so many stationary bike rides.

Every ACTION...

2009-05-25T17:50:00.000+10:00

Here are the good things about Belconnen Interchange being shut down:

... um ... what about? ... um, no, not that ... hmmm ...

which is kinda outweighed by the zero shelter at my new bus stop down past the ATO.

That'll be good for both winter and summer!

OK, I will enjoy not being force-fed bad jazz via awful speakers, but I doubt getting blasted by wind and/or rain and/or sun for the next 18 months is a suitable tradeoff.

Peoplin' it

2009-03-09T15:56:00.000+11:00

This blog has been extremely quiet as a result of me feeling I have nothing new to say. I doubt anyone's keenly feeling the loss of my aimless complaining, and through judicious use of Twitter I'm ensuring those who use this blog as evidence of my pulse don't have to fear my disappearance.

Some people can talk about their job, but mine is strongly people-based, rather than tech-focused, making it impossible to cover anything meaningfully without horrible invasions of others' privacy.

Even I'm sick of writing about walking (although I continue to enjoy the actual activity itself).

My drawings, the only real evidence I have that I do anything other than watch DVDs, has a home in my other blog.

If I find a need for an alternative outlet, this will be the place I return, but until that happens I expect it will be sparse reading here, at best.

Let me tell you ...

2008-12-10T08:59:00.001+11:00

... what doesn't help you recover from a bout of fatigue. Being woken up at 1am by my old friend "severe stomach pain". Sitting up eventually helped ease it (that's good), but I couldn't lie down again for another 5 hours (that's bad). I got to sleep immediately after that (that's good), but woke up an hour later when my stomach cried out for its regular breakfast feed (that's both good and bad).

Is the fun over? Time will tell...

Lazy updates

2008-12-08T20:37:00.001+11:00

Considering I never even update my Facebook status (because my life is filled with routine and enjoyable solitude), it hardly seems sensible to make use of another micro-blogging avenue like Twitter. However, I've now done exactly that and only time will tell whether the updates flow more regularly into the sidebar of this blog as a result. It certainly requires less thought from me than the infrequent paragraphs about my health which have adorned the pages thus far, so maybe you'll find out a little more about the much less that I do with my time :)

November rain

2008-11-26T09:53:00.001+11:00

In contrast to the positivity of my last post, the past couple of weeks have been a health struggle. A week after my hospital visit, the kidney stone pain came back and hung around for a week, until it finally passed. I got a whole 3 days of relief and health before embarking on 4 days of gastro, starting Thu last week, meaning this morning is the first time for a week that I've finally been able to eat normal food.

Hopefully that's my quota of new illnesses for the year and December will be more pleasant!

How not to ...

2008-11-04T08:25:00.000+11:00

... spend one's birthday.

I've had some sickly November 3rd's in the past, but this may be just my second where I spent the day in hospital (my first on my actual birth-day). I woke up to severe abdominal pain, distinct from the usual variants caused my GERD, and after trying all my usual remedies and only getting worse, headed in to Calvary for my 12-hour stay.

After tests, drips, morphine and lots of waiting, it luckily turned out to be no more than a kidney stone, which should take care of itself over the next few days. I somehow have to drink 5L of water each of the next few days, while also returning to my usual eating regime (after almost 24 hours with no food).

I'm pleased at how well my stomach has bounced back, even though a small bowl of cereal took me an hour to eat when I got home last night. Considering any digestive stability I have is the result of a finely-tuned eating schedule and prescription medication, messing with my routine often means a week or more of rebuilding my tolerance for food. Right now all I have is a nasty headache, and general fatigue, but have successfully eaten my normal breakfast.

It was also great to get home to many SMS and Facebook birthday wishes :) Here's to being 35!

Weekend

2008-10-01T09:15:00.001+10:00

On Saturday I had an excellent time celebrating the wedding of Sid and Sarah. Since I don't generally post photos of people without a web presence, the evidence below is fairly lightweight...

The ceremony took place right by the Carillon:

Here I am enjoying the sun and my free balloon:

Between the wedding and reception, we all enjoyed a Hawks grand final win, Spuddy more than all of us:

Then, after much merriment, an entirely sober me was still smiling, long after my bedtime:

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Music, listening to

2008-09-14T16:09:00.001+10:00

I upgraded to iTunes 8 earlier in the week, and it has two main new features:

(1) A grid view to let you navigate albums and artists by the pretty cover art. If you happen to listen to your music whole albums at a time rather than via playlists, the new grid view will be perfect for you. For me, it just gets in the way.
(2) The "Genius" music suggester which can create an automatic playlist from your own library, based on a selected track, as well as give you options for music you might like to buy from the iTunes store. The accuracy I've seen so far isn't bad, but the last thing I really need is more options for parting with cash.

One other thing I had a look at was Songbird, an open source iTunes-alike. If you want more customisability, and don't have an established addiction to the iTunes/iPod combo, this could easily be the option for you. It's designed to allow easy music discovery (either free or for purchase), and you can replace the often-gappy album art of iTunes with access to Last.FM (and presumably other sources) instead. It grabs data from an existing iTunes library easily, and plays even iTunes-store-purchased music quite happily. It doesn't include podcasts or movies (by default anyway) but these may well be available add-ons, which would mean it can do anything I already use iTunes for. It recognised my iPod, but I wasn't game to risk synching from it, since some of my content wasn't visible, and could easily have disappeared.

Blogged with the Flock Browser

New playthings?

2008-09-14T16:01:00.001+10:00

It'd been a while since I last tried out a new flavour of social network, so I splurged on a handful of online aggregators today, looking for something which compared favourably with Facebook for pulling together my various activities across blogging, music, photo and bookmarking sites. Sadly, nothing really succeeded.

Out of the multitude of available options, I had an initial play with the following: FriendFeed, Mugshot, SecondBrain, Youmeo, and SocialURL.

Of these, FriendFeed was really the only one to come close to what I was looking for, delivering a seamless RSS feed from 7 of the sites I use. Normally that would only be useful for someone-not-me, since I'm the one putting the content there in the first place, so an update to the feed shouldn't really surprise me. However, FriendFeed allows you to define "imaginary" friends, by specifying their public pages (e.g. blogs, Flickr, LibraryThing) and it turns that all into one big combined feed. To be honest, that's not immediately useful, since I already subscribe to a host of individual feeds giving me the same info, but if my PC dies or I'm away from home it would make getting updates much easier.

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Balance

2008-09-12T22:28:00.001+10:00

More Wii news:

I've had to adjust the Wii Fit exercises I was doing, as I've been suffering from a nasty aggravation of ankle tendonitis (something which was creeping upon me even pre-Wii). Easing off on some bits of yoga and hard stepping seems to be helping, and in the meantime my abs and back get the workout they sorely need.
I've successfully survived an entire week of self-imposed Zelda ban, after averaging more than 5 hours a day seemed a bit extreme. Will I return to my virtual adventuring soon? Time will tell.

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Yesymbak

2008-07-23T08:51:00.001+10:00

OK, I'd be surprised if anyone's even bothering to check this blog any more, after my extended absence, but here goes with a return of sorts:

That "cold" I succumbed to last post turned out to entirely wreck my health for an extended period, my CFS flaring up as badly as it had for a decade. I am now mostly recovered due to:

many hours in bed over April and May,
a reduction in my work hours from 30 to 20 hours a week,
various relaxation strategies,
an even healthier eating regime,
the (intentional) loss of 10kg in 19 weeks.

I've spent more than two-thirds of my voting life frustrated by a Liberal government focused on their exclusively financial dogma, with no regard for anyone but the already affluent. From a purely self-centred viewpoint, it makes no difference to the comfort level of my life who is in power. I own my own home, have a solid education and well-paid job. But I'm in the minority, and I don't believe Australia can be sold as being prosperous while so many are still disadvantaged.

Yesterday's election marks a long overdue turning point, where social justice is high on the priority list. I had become demoralised reading ALP policy, knowing that the existing government had no intention of changing their ways. This morning I'm able to look at those same Labor policies with hope and enthusiasm, a genuine belief that things will improve. For example, just the initiatives mentioned in this Julia Gillard speech a few days ago illustrate a radical change in focus from the last 11 years.

I feel like a huge weight of decade-long cynicism has been lifted from my shoulders and I dare to dream of Australia becoming the country I want it to be, untainted by the impersonal, workers-as-drones, everyone-for-himself world our former government was pushing, but can no longer progress.

Blogged with Flock

Remembering

2007-11-20T13:23:00.001+11:00

Due to my hatred of shopping, I've delayed upgrading my PC's memory for waaay too long, coping with the almost constant thrashing caused by 512 MB of RAM plus too many hungry apps. Yesterday I bought an extra gig of RAM via the magic of e-commerce, it arrived via post today, and it has now tripled my available memory in one go, making those greedy apps work much more smoothly, and making my impatience less of an issue.

Of course the ridiculous heat means I will only be able to enjoy the newfound performance boost in short, few-minute gasps before having to escape the sauna that is my computer room... Roll on winter!

[DVD] Transformers

2007-11-17T15:57:00.001+11:00

I watched this (birthday present) with some trepidation, as I didn't want my fond childhood memories of the Transformers squashed. Luckily, there was a decent amount of transforming going on (although too light on the classic sound effect). I'm sure I missed out on some of the spectacle by not seeing it on a cinema screen, but it was still an enjoyable diversion, and fits well with the other entries in the Michael Bay ouevre already in my collection - Bad Boys, Armageddon and The Island.

Add to that the unbeatable timbre of Optimus Prime's oration and the imposing DVD case (above), and it's a tidy little package (with over 2 hours of running time value).

[DVD] Bones - Season 2

2007-11-16T16:04:00.001+11:00

I hungrily devoured this long-awaited season, and was left satiated (how's that for some metaphor, huh?). The humour is finely balanced with the horror of the subject matter, and the characters and their relationships continue to deepen, with the knowledge of a third season currently screening in the US giving me further involving stories to look forward to.

Episode 9, "Aliens in a Spaceship", is particularly powerful and totally absorbed me, despite having no aliens and no spaceship. Plus you can't go wrong throwing Stephen Fry into the mix for a few episodes.

[DVD] Boston Legal - Season 3

2007-11-16T15:57:00.001+11:00

I can't rave enough about Boston Legal, it just gets better with each season. It is genuinely exceptional in its storytelling and performances, and manages to deliver important messages (relevant to a broad audience, given the Americanisation of world culture) without ever getting preachy. It ranges widely in tone across hilarious, touching, powerful and thought-provoking, without ever skipping a beat. The Alan/Jerry and Claire/Clarence relationships in this season are particular favourites of mine. I also enjoyed every moment the 4th wall was kicked down, allowing the show to be enjoyed for its absurdity along with its pathos.

Wonder years

2007-11-16T15:46:00.001+11:00

I've been trapped in my own thoughts the past few weeks, really struggling to get any coherence out of my head, Thank to Em, and a lunchtime chat with her today, the worst of my cyclic mulling has been removed. And it would be a shame to waste this taste of clarity, so I've returned to my neglected blog. (Disclaimer: The following may bear no resemblance to clarity as you understand the term...)

Here's what was crystallised by talking to Em, but was triggered by my brief period of acting director. Without realising it, I'd settled into a management routine and was no longer questioning my skills. The additional responsibility of my temporary role forced me to review many assumptions, and I found myself wanting. As I wound back to my previous role, I've been leaning back towards the hands-on technical (i.e. programming) part of my previously people-focused role. This reaction could have at least two interpretations:

1 ... Having exposed a lack of interest in taking on a broader, more challenging management role, I've decided to give building another go, shifting the career direction I'd been taking, away from the project/people management.

2 ... Scared to actually have to work at the parts of my job I already felt I was outstanding in, but proved myself wrong about, I've gone scurrying back to the black and white of code.

To be honest, I don't really know which of these is most accurate! And my perception of a lack of ability in the management area, or being able to step up another level, have had no external drivers. The feedback from others on my time in the acting role was exclusively positive. Being aware of this internal uncertainty at least allows me to work towards establishing/confirming goals for myself career-wise. While I miss the comfy rut I'd created, I at least know I need to reset my path. What will it be? Excitement awaits!

[DVD] Veronica Mars - S3

2007-11-07T21:11:00.001+11:00

Less than 48 hours (and exactly 20 episodes) after the final season began, it also ended :(

On a positive note, the quality remained high throughout, the new characters who appeared once college started supplemented the cast really well, there were plenty of laughs, as well as some genuine suspense. While I'm disappointed the Veronica FBI season didn't get the go-ahead, and the ending left plenty of unanswered questions, it was one enjoyable ride.

In the place where I work

2007-11-03T11:10:00.001+11:00

I'm on the verge of a move from the too-much-sun environs of 2S to hopefully window-free 5S and, since no one else was in when I arrived at 7.30 the other day, I took the opportunity to record for posterity my current luxurious space.

First a glimpse at my Mr. Happy, "I'm So Happy" Droopy and mini-dolphin, who sit beneath my monitor and remind me of... friends? ... something? ... hmmm...

Then there's the sweep of my desk, encompassing my array of snacks, piles of paper (which I'm forced to endure due to a complete lack of wall space) and my purdy VoIP phone...

Finally, the whole expanse of my double space, with meeting desk, electronic whiteboard and test PC desk, looking out over not only my team but the entire floor, master of some of what I survey...

I bet you wish you were me right now :)

I... am waiting... for a bus

2007-11-03T10:59:00.001+11:00

7am... Friday morning... Sensational clouds...

Waiting for lunch

2007-11-03T10:58:00.001+11:00

Here are a few photos I took while sitting by Lake G waiting to have lunch at Black Pepper with Liv, Em, K and L a few weeks back.

Blergh

2007-11-02T21:54:00.001+11:00

A brief little note to celebrate an upcoming 5 days of R&R, the finale to a 4 month Director stint which has been enjoyable but draining. And my microwave has finally returned home!

I've watched My Name Is Earl S2, Millennium S2 and the first season of 30 Rock over the past few weeks, and now have Boston Legal S3 and Seinfeld S9 (plus the impending arrival of Bones S2 and Veronica Mars S3) to look forward to, as I head into a month with only 6 more working days, and a whole lot of holiday.

Plus I might occasionally get out of my recliner to go for some walks... we'll see...

Lunch ahoy!

2007-10-13T08:16:00.001+10:00

I have to say that the past week was almost universally excellent, despite my lack of hot food.

I had lunch with friends on Tuesday, Thursday and Friday, and my stomach behaved itself amazingly well (until last night, there's something about Fridays...).

Plus, I did a bunch of drawings which are now clogging up my Media Empire.

In addition to all that (which would have been enough), work was really positive, and I actually felt like I earned my Director $'s. I'm even overly enthusiastic about the stuff which should fall into place over the next month to better position our publishing process/systems to handle our future web directions.

The dark ages

2007-10-06T13:22:00.001+10:00

Almost 12 months to the day after my last microwave kicked it, I find myself again lacking in nuclear power. I've heard it's possible to heat food using something called a "stove", but I have yet to be convinced...

Spider-Man 3

2007-10-02T21:07:00.001+10:00

I finally got around to watching this, and wasn't disappointed. There's a weird tonal change a bit over halfway through the movie, as an alien parasite turns Peter Parker into 70's John Travolta, but that's funny rather than jarring. Venom looks great, and the fight scenes suitably one-up the earlier movies.

Heroes

2007-10-02T12:43:00.001+10:00

My well-practiced patience, having waited until the DVD release to watch Heroes, was amply paid off by an absorbing 3 day marathon, where each episode was better than the last. It even had me saying aloud "That's awesome" several times, despite watching it solo.

Of course I now have to wait another year to watch Season 2...

American Gothic

2007-10-02T12:39:00.001+10:00

I was thoroughly enjoying my viewing experience of the American Gothic blast from the past until the completely-out-of-order episodes kicked in, and any narrative flow disappeared entirely. Now you may well say "Bertie, surely it can't have been that bad". And I'll reply with the ordering of the episodes, rearranging the order they appear on the DVDs and listing them in the order they should be viewed:

1-5, 19, 6-7, 14, 13, 8, 20, 9-12, 15, 21, 16, 22, 17-18

"Hmmm," you say, "I agree Bertie, that's seriously f**ked up!!!"

The problem here is that I'd watched the first 12 eps before I noticed anything wrong, and by then it was far too late.

On the positive side, the performances were excellent, with some genuinely conflicted characters, and the slowish in-episode pacing creates a uniquely unsettling mood. Not to mention that (when watched in DVD order) you can't possibly predict what's going to happen next...

Brisbane

2007-10-02T12:27:00.001+10:00

I've slipped out of the photo-taking habit, so my Brisbane photos from the weekend are exclusively of the ride from the airport:

and the view from my balcony:

But they give a good impression of just how great the weather was, and how different the sights are to my usual Canberra vantage.

Congratulations!

2007-10-01T20:41:00.001+10:00

While it was quite a struggle for me health-wise, I'm incredibly glad I had the opportunity to be in Brisbane for Linda and Byron's wedding this weekend. My friends, many now from distant capitals (as well as those from Canberra I don't see often) have always helped me to push through my many varieties of chronic illness, and this was no exception. Thankfully, a few doses of sleep since I got home have taken the edge off the crappiness of my body, and I now have a couple of days to relax, enjoy the rest of a 5 day weekend, and be ready to launch back into work on Thursday. 48 hours of Brisbane trip with only about 5 hours of sleep certainly makes time go by slowly, and while that can be a double-edged sword, I didn't get cut too badly this time around ;)

Not a bad weekend really

2007-09-09T09:23:00.001+10:00

The Eels snuck through in the first round of the finals.
The Hawks also won.
Had one of my Flickr photos "published"
Sunday morning has returned to fine weather, allowing me to walk again.
I've watched many, many episodes of Veronica Mars (Season 1), in preparation for the DVD release of the final season next month.
My new DVD shelves have been installed, giving me room to grow my collection to even more ridiculous widths.

So very lazy

2007-09-01T13:16:00.001+10:00

In the absence of having anything to say...

You scored as Wallace Fennel, You are an awesome friend and Veronica's sidekick, but you don't mind... except you're afraid of getting expelled for getting all of those permanent records.

Wallace Fennel

50%

Veronica Mars

44%

Backup (2.0)

44%

Logan Echolls

38%

Keith Mars

25%

Lilly Kane

13%

Duncan Kane

13%

Eli

Which Veronica Mars Character Are You?
created with QuizFarm.com

To be honest, I expected Keith Mars, daggy and bald :)

Gorgonzola mittens

2007-08-29T08:58:00.001+10:00

As you can see, I made a (successful) last gasp effort at my cycling, 85km in the last 3 weeks, before I switched over to walking to take advantage of the fine spring weather. So this particular graph has come to an end, but I have just returned from my 6th hour-long walk in the past 6 days, ready for my Thursday rest day.

I'm halfway through Sliders S3, and thoroughly enjoying yet another reminiscing TV experience, as well as finally completing my Fast and the Furious trilogy, with an adrenaline pumping Sunday night viewing of Tokyo Drift (aka Fastest and Furiousest).

Interesting? No. My life? Yes.