Another one of my pet dwelling topics, seeking a return to child-like wonder. This article ties aspects of that in with writing. A couple of paragraphs to give you the flavour:
"How do you find surprises? Well, therein lies half the work of essay writing. (The other half is expressing yourself well.) The trick is to use yourself as a proxy for the reader. You should only write about things you've thought about a lot. And anything you come across that surprises you, who've thought about the topic a lot, will probably surprise most readers."
"When it comes to surprises, the rich get richer. But (as with wealth) there may be habits of mind that will help the process along. It's good to have a habit of asking questions, especially questions beginning with Why. But not in the random way that three year olds ask why. There are an infinite number of questions. How do you find the fruitful ones?"
I've been thinking a lot about my leadership style, team management, and personal motivation recently. While the drain of being sick so much the past year or so has certainly played a part in my occasionally flagging enthusiasm at work (and elsewhere), I've felt there's more to it. Struggling to become part of a team again, when I don't even know day to day whether I'll be able to get out of bed, has been exhausting. And much of my work, at first glance, requires me to do things myself. Which isn't what makes me happy anymore (maybe it never really did).
Here are a few thoughts I jotted down around midnight when I couldn't sleep.
I've realised I crave group situations, working with teams, chatting with friends, interacting.
When I'm undertaking a solo task, I spend a lot of time thinking "How can this be transformed into something collaborative?"
It's not enough to be doing things for people, it has to be with people too.
My extended illness(es) have served to isolate me from group situations, as well as shifted me to a me-first thinking necessary to try to get better.
It's hard for me to go out for food/drink with any confidence of avoiding a relapse.
It's hard to make plans, when I'm quite frequently struck with illness unexpectedly.
Its hard to avoid talking about my health problems 'cause of how largely they've loomed over me for 15 months.
Hard, but not impossible, and it's this (fairly) recent realisation that I actually don't like being alone that helps me drag myself through some really bad days (sometimes ending in the "disaster" of a rapid retreat from work to bed).
So, what do I need to do? Get involved with more groups: volunteer, discussions, study, whatever. As long as it's collaboration.
Shenanigans Loaded began our 3rd season on Monday night, having moved up from A3 to A2. Tired and sore from our basketball of the Moruya weekend, we only fielded 6 players. And came away with the win! Batto "the Rain Man" knocked down a trademark 3-pointer to stretch the lead at a key time, I grabbed plenty of rebounds, and the fit young guys did all the rest of the work (i.e. running, jumping, scoring) to produce a convincing win. Hooray!
OK, on a less serious note (if I think too much about John Howard and his cronies, I'll continue to be a big ball of rage), here's a little taste of the Moruya weekend (which I've only just recovered from, and I behaved myself).
Day 1 Shenanigans arrived at our three awesome cabins, overlooking the river, on Friday afternoon and settled in to relax, drink, and talk crap. Eventually someone complained they were hungry and we headed across the 1km bridge to town and ordered pizza (plus cashew chicken for picky me). G and Spud proceeded to eat far more than should be humanly possible, before we all went for a drink or three at the Air Raid. One offering to the dolphin later and we headed for home, nominally to be ready for tomorrow's 9am game. Day 2 Everyone (except me) struggled up and off the stadium (I conveniently stayed in bed) to lose by a single point. A Batto power nap, and some rice cakes for me, later and we were off to play our two afternoon games. Two more losses by 5 points and 1 point respectively, and the basketball was out of the way. Time to get drinking (OK, to continue drinking). Day 3 Finals time. A 10.30 game gave us time to ease into the day and pack up, the trip over all too soon. We lost again, by 2 points in overtime, to complete a perfect weekend. A lunch of fish and chips and a detour to Batemans Bay, and we were headed home. A few stragglers wound down the rest of the day at Shenanigans Central, not wanting the weekend to end. But end it did, and our livers, stomachs and brains were all very grateful...
By reinstating the Howard dictatorship, the voting majority of Australia have once again displayed they are insular, selfish and short sighted. Here are a few reasons why:
International opinion of our country is at an all time low. Human rights abuses of refugees, failure to sign the Kyoto Protocol and continued insults of our Asian neighbours illustrating the solely US-centric view of the world the Liberals hold.
Those least able to support themselves will continue to struggle. An ever widening class divide, which is the antithesis of everything I love about Australia, due to economic decisions made with no social conscience. Education opportunities only available to the rich. Victimisation of legitimate welfare recipients, due to poorly outsourced welfare functions.
Anything not tied down will be sold off to build a better "bottom line", e.g. Telstra, our forests, our economic sovereignty.
What good is a surplus when Australian kids see education options drying up, the health system is barely functional, and thousands are homeless. I've always been proud to be an Australian in the past, but the destruction to the essential goodness of my country, reaped by a heartless, unaccountable government over the past decade (and now set to continue, due to what I can only consider hopeless ignorance) has me ashamed of my nationality.
In my review of Doo 2 for the (eventually to be released) next issue of the Shenanigans Files, I was uncharacteristically harsh. But I've had a change of heart. I wrote the earlier review before actually watching the DVD, based entirely on my negative cinema experience. Much like The Matrix Revolutions, I found Doo 2 was better on the small screen (strange for special effects movies). Maybe sitting in a cinema on my own isn't conducive to enjoying comedy?
I've decided that the key reason why I enjoy almost every movie I see (or book I read, or play I go to) is that I know how much effort everyone involved has put into it, and it'd be wrong of me to pooh-pooh it simply because it's not perfect. If I had to live with expectations of perfection in my job, I probably wouldn't be sitting quite so pretty, so I'm willing to give points for effort. And making a living in a creative field only makes it more personal when there is (inevitable) criticism.
Watching the brief special features on the Doo 2 DVD (along with the dancing Scooby Doo I now have on my PC) gave me an appreciation for the care and attention that went into making the film, and a little of that enthusiasm has carried across into my impression of the movie. And, to be honest, it's certainly no worse than the original cartoon, the best bit of which was always Scooby himself, much like the movie.
So anyone who thought I might have grown a critical spine... 'fraid not.
OK, anyone that knows me also knows I'm not-at-all-critical... of anything... except certain political stances. So you can take this "review" with the associated grain of salt.
I've never seen a Will Smith movie I didn't like (even Wild Wild West entertained me), and this is certainly a Will Smith movie, not an Isaac Asimov one. If you've read the short stories you'll recognise a character or two, e.g. Dr. Susan Calvin, but there're a lot more explosions than philosophical discussions about why a robot seems to be breaking one of the Three Laws of Robotics. Having said that, it's not all shallow, and the whizz-bang factor is high (and I just love watching action movies on my new TV... Have I mentioned that?... Several annoying times, you say?...)
I remember playing this when I was a kid on my neighbour's Microbee, or maybe it was on my first XT computer (with 512K of RAM and a 5.25" floppy drive!). I was bad at it then, I'm still bad at it now (lack of patience and concentration being large barriers). But if you think you have what it takes to survive past the bulldozer, try out the Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy Game.
This will hopefully allow me to compose new posts, and edit existing ones, without needing to log in to Blogger. Not that that's such an imposition, but when were new toys not good?
Try out w.bloggar for yourself (it's free!). I'm sure Web interfaces are lovely, but this seems much easier for me.
OK, apparently I'm too "smart" for the ' how to add comments to your blog' instructions :) But, after looking in minute detail at Liv's, I finally have a working version that removes all (non-laziness-related) barriers to me blogging(-a-rama).
Visited (the Belconnen branch of) Revolution CD at lunchtime today, to kill time and assure myself I'm not becoming a workaholic. Little did I know that as soon as I plonked my handful of selected CDs on the counter, the fire alarm would go off and I'd have to wait out the front of the store for 10 minutes while waiting for the fire department to give the all clear. Anyway, despite the delay I was very happy with my purchases.
However, in the process of listening to my new CDs I discovered that, instead of White Zombie's "Astro-Creep 2000" I've been given the soundtrack to "Eddie". Pretty funny, I guess, but I'm going to draw the line at listening to what is no doubt described as "Music from, and inspired by, the hit comedy Eddie". When it's headlined by a Coolio track (without so much as the word "gangsta" in the title) you know it's a worry.
I think the main thing preventing me from spending more time browsing the Web for interesting content was I had to dial-up and be sensitive to the phone needs of housemates before. Now, with ADSL, I can surf whenever I want. Which raises the issue that there's so much out there to look at, and not nearly enough time to see it all. I'm sure I'll come up with some strategies for getting the most value out of a reasonable amount of computer time, but I'm not there yet.
While I struggle to keep on top of everything I want to investigate, here're a few of the places I've been recently:
Plus stuff which may be the next generation of what I take for granted at work, thanks to the collaborative environment of Lotus products (and related to my blurb above about info overload) http://www.research.ibm.com/SocialComputing/AR.htm I actually feel quite cut off from the world when on my home PC, as at work we have pervasive Instant Messaging and presence awareness. I only miss it when it's gone. Might have to play with some other IM tools to reconnect.
I might almost be able to mistake all the "news" above as a life, but I'm far too cynical for that. Next time, I'll hopefully have something to say about the new Hellboy I bought from K on Monday (haven't even started it yet, though).
Update (2/10): I would've lost Liv's comment when reshaping this post, so here 'tis: "Wikipedia is very cool. You might be interested in this dicussion, which I got to from Brianstorms." Thanks Liv, I was interested!
My new TV is as cool as it should be for the kind of money I paid, so I'm happy, even after only sleeping 3 hours (too much excitement? Now I remember why I don't get excited about anything).
All I need now is for the Opals to beat Brazil tonight, to finalise top spot in their pool, and this great weather, hanging with mates, buying cool new toys weekend will be ... well... pretty damn good!
Wow! Lots of stuff has happened today. Other than it being awesome weather, allowing us to soak up some sun as we played basketball and wish we were already in Moruya, I've finally got my broadband connection, meaning I have zero excuses not to update this blog frequently and often (I'm aware that's a double positive...).
Add to that the fact that tomorrow I will be the proud owner of a 132cm DLP rear projection TV, and I'm as excited as I've been in weeks/months.
Now that I think about it, I better do some of the work I brought home tonight, before I get absorbed in watching everything possible on my new TV...
Sunday, July 18, 2004
I had a "letter" all prepared to send off to the Canberra Times, but it seems pretty lame when compared to the usual content of refugees, war, etc. which are the legacy of the current government. So I didn't send it off, but here it is anyway:
End of an Era Impact Records, a Canberra institution for almost 30 years, will soon close its doors, muscled out of existence by JB Hi-Fi in aggressive search of the almighty dollar.
Impact was the only shop I've ever enjoyed. Browsing for hours, no pressure salesmanship, varied background music and relaxed staff.
I've had enough of the homogenising of our retail market, and will be voting with my wallet. I know Impact won't be resurrected by the gesture, but JB won't get a cent from me.
Tuesday, July 13, 2004
This'll probably be very disjointed, as I wrote it around midnight last night, when I was pretty tired from b/ball but still unable to sleep.
I've spent a large part of the last, Liberals in government, decade bitching about how bad the Liberals are, how I've disagreed with every "policy" they've proposed or implemented since their first (the gun buy back scheme). I hate their dollars before people approach, the fact that they clearly enjoy the power trip and show no inclination to listen to anything their constituents, e.g. me, might have to say.
But, on the flip side, have I done a single thing to improve things? donations to "Learning For Life" have salved my very uneasy conscience somewhat. However, I haven't spoken up against the many injustices which have been foisted upon the less fortunate. Partly I feel helpless, resigned to the wait for another election, praying Labor might do better. Partly, I feel too ignorant, having avoided the news almost obsessively because of how utterly depressing it is.
I don't have any good excuse, though, for not doing something. I'd like to contribute, to help, to improve things and restore Australia to the place I've spent my life being proud of, confident nowhere could be a more awesome place to live.
How will I do this? Try to stir up my brain first, fanned by the flames of possibly the only thing I've been passionate about for years, and that is the anger I've felt at the injustices of our current "leadership". It's so rare for me to have strong feelings about anything any more that I think it's been wasteful of me not to harness it long before now.
As a first step, I recommend anyone to have a look at the new "Not Happy, John!" link I've added, to see the beginnings of discussion which has raised hope in me where there was little before, that there are plenty of people who are concerned about the direction of our country, and are willing to do something about it. Join in!
Sunday, June 27, 2004
Grrrr... As someone who has never really been too choosy about what I eat, I'm now coming to terms with how food labelling legislation needs some serious work. After finally having my health back on track, starting my normal workload last week, I started getting sick again, without knowing why. After 2 days of steadily worsening stomach pain and nausea, I had another look at the box of cereal I'd started on a few days earlier. And was it clearly labelled with a giant "CONTAINS GLUTEN!!!" message? Obviously not. They'd settled for some small printing, away from the ingredients list, leading me to believe I was perfectly safe.
After hopping into my hazmat jumpsuit and disposing of the remaining cereal in a radiation-proof container, I am starting to feel better again. It supposedly takes 3 days for the effect of having gluten to wear off, and I'm 2 days into that, so confident tomorrow morning will see me fit(ish) and ready to go to work.
