Feb stats

Books read - 11
DVD boxsets watched - 7
Distance walked - 50km (spread over 24 walks)
Drawings done - 12

After around 3 weeks of mostly bedrest either side of the Jan-Feb transition, I've been rebuilding strength via a daily dog-walking excursion with my parents. This has been 2km at about two-thirds pace, and seems to be exactly what my body can handle. The one time I pushed myself a bit harder my fatigue hit back, but still feels like progress.

Over the past few days I've even found a sleep routine that has me waking rested, rather than exhausted, without taking up my whole day (hopefully it'll persist!). This leads to both a better mood and some of the concentration needed to draw again, which I've been enjoying.

Sparrows

Sparrows
Originally uploaded by bertiemabootoo

This video doesn't really do it justice, but during my walk this morning the sky was filled with sparrows, crazily flying all over. It was a really amazing sight!

January stats

Books read - 10
DVD movies watched - 27
Distance walked - 60km
Drawings done - 0

I've been monitoring my action count since October 2006, but only last month realised that it wasn't very useful to measure without setting targets. So last month I identified the actions I wanted to emphasise, and ended up achieving 92% of my overall target (147/160). While I didn't draw as planned, I did more reading and walking, which balanced things out.

I've upped my drawing target for Feb to keep me looking at that as something needing more focus. I'm still far from settled on the right mix of walking to resting, as the second half of Jan was quite the fatigue-y struggle, and today has been far from encouraging. Oh well, 11 months left to work things out :)

Fly

After buying some new walking shoes on Thu, finally got a chance to christen them this morning, with immediate positive results. Actually got my walking speed back up over 6kph (for a 3k walk) after it'd been hovering at 5.6kph (must've been walking kinda dainty). And my knees and ankles feel fine! Surely this can only help maintain my walking enthusiasm :)

Broken!

The fruits of my labours so far, records for all my walking metrics :) And I'm less than halfway through the month! Of course I have to spend the remainder of my days resting, so hopefully it'll take a smaller percentage of my energy to maintain this over time...

Build

My focus the past week or so has been almost exclusively on building up my walking capacity, which has paid off nicely. 12 walks in the last 14 days including a couple of full hour-long efforts. While I've been sore, I haven't been fatigued, so must be doing something right :)

Another week or so of this and I can start to shift my attention to something else on my long todo list, with a base of strength to build from!

Week 1

Amazingly, I've only been on holidays for a week but it already feels like a month away from work. Which is a good thing, given the legitimate concern that a year off will fly by all too quickly.

So, what do I have to show for this strangely stretched time?

Firstly, a return to walking (although still a bit of a struggle) and weights (very light, but a start).

Secondly, some drawing. Well, ok, one drawing... But it's my first in 2 months and so I have to rebuild a routine.

Thirdly, lots of time with family, with Christmas gatherings spread across 2 days plus my usual Thursday dinner.

Fourthly, reading, with 2 more finished books taking me to 70 for the year. Not the 100 I was on track for back in April, but a step ahead of last year, which was an increase on the year before that. Perhaps 2012 will see a century...

Fifthly, some DVD watching. I'm still working out where I'll draw the line between relaxing in front of the tv and doing more constructive things. Overthinking it threatens to suck the life out of me, so I'm just going by feel for now.

Finally, I've written this post, a rare occurrence indeed! Hopefully there'll be more to come.

When I write it up like that, I can convince myself I've been much busier than I really have :) Lots more to do though!

Why a PM?

Here's a little taste of the kind of thought that sit in my head, and explains why even the briefest taste of "news" both drains me and makes me want to scream...

Are there any compelling reasons why we have a PM, and a Cabinet, which have some kind of precedence in decision making? Come to that, why do we need any aspect of an adversarial "govt vs opposition" approach? This makes a mockery of proportional representation, since all those who have voted for their local member, presumably on the basis that he or she represents local interests most effectively, are left without any kind of effective voice in decision making. It also disregards members' individual expertise.

If collegiate decisions could be made by the parliament as a whole, using the entire knowledge and skills of the group, surely the results would be more representative?

There would be no need for factional fighting, for arguments over who should lead, for secrets between or within parties which weaken the collective decision making process.

Double rainbow

Taken from my family's new deck this afternoon.

Bounce

Got past a brief crisis of mental strength after my last post, where I stopped believing my health will improve and also had the feeling that reading books and watching DVDs was futile, no matter whether I was enjoying them or not. Always searching for something 'important' to do...

Luckily, today the sun shone on my longest walk for 6 weeks, even if it was for the dreadest of purposes - grocery shopping (gasp!). Survived ok, although the day after has usually been when the CFS hits.

Added to that, my sister lent me a handful of her recent TV-on-DVD purchases, giving me something new to watch as I eagerly wait for Fringe S3 to arrive.

First up was a mini-series, The Lost Room, which was only 4 hours long (thus just a snack) but excellent. Strong taste of Twilight Zone to it.

I've now started into Leverage S1 and after just 2 eps I'm totally sold. Fast-paced, funny and with the great helping-the-little-guy theme that makes The Pretender one of my favourite shows. Nice to know there are at least 3 more seasons after this one too.

Yep

Encouraging signs today. Turns out that if I spend 15 hours in bed, and do zero exercise, the pain I've been in the past week or two fades almost completely. Ok, that's not exactly practical longer term, but it's a platform to build on.

I really need this upcoming year off, my management-speak habit seems a little out of control in that last sentence ;)

Little

My road back to health continues at the opposite of apace. As soon as the bulk of my new (and thankfully temporary) symptoms eased off, good ol' CFS kicked in again, so the past week or so has been a bit of a struggle. It's been awesome to be out of bed and making my small work contributions again, though :) Also good being able to read for more than a few minutes at a time (after arrogantly trumpeting my return to books not long ago!), and walking the extreme distance of 800m every few days (with disproportionate pain and fatigue, but it's something!).

And that's why I've had nothing to write! Does the above at least sound moderately positive amongst the frustration? I hope so :)

Reading again

After the complete stall in reading that was May and June, putting a very large dent in my 100 book plan for the year, I've finally regained momentum. Over the past 4 days I've finished off 3 novels, and started into a 4th :) It's nice to have the ability to concentrate for more than 15 minutes at a time again!

Told me so

I seem to have bounced back ok from the cold that hit me almost immediately after I wrote that last post... Coincidence sure does make it hard to stave off superstition! On the plus side, since I had to rest the last few days anyway, at least the weather was ordinary and I didn't feel like I was missing out on anything :)

Today I let my team and my key clients know of my plans to take 2012 off, so the wheels are really starting to accelerate towards my "Year of Adventure"! (Disclaimer: Adventure not guaranteed.)

10

Almost didn't write this, then realised it was just my superstition about writing positive stuff getting in the way of shelling out more good news health-wise.

Today was my 10th walk in a row, as well as being my longest walk for the year (4.4km in 45 minutes). The best part was that the walk felt easier as I went on, something which is definitely not the case when my fatigue is a factor. With awful weather scheduled to kick off from Monday, there's every chance I will be cutting back on the walks, but I'm hopeful that the routine I've returned to will give me the impetus to partake of some indoorsy exercise as a replacement (that exercise bike won't ride Itself!).

I have lunch plans with 2 friends already scheduled for next week, my tenants finally move out tomorrow, and I'm generally just enjoying feeling normal again :)

Complete

Seven straight days with walking (roughly 16km total) and the last couple of days have actually felt good. Nice to walk for half an hour and feel like I have more in me :) I had a timorous target of returning to what used to be my usual 6km walks by the end of the year, but there seems every chance I'll manage it far sooner. Now if only I can restore my optimal sleep patterns, i.e. get more than a few 2 hour snippets a night, the sky's the limit!

Almost

So begins what I hope will be a successful return to exercise. Unsure whether it's been triggered by my impatience, or that my body had finally had sufficient bedrest :)

After some light weights on Wed, I've had 3 straight lunchtime walks, with today's effort a 30 minute stroll. While that gave me a slight stitch and aggravated my various tendonitises (to be expected after such a sedentary dual-month), I didn't get hit by immediate fatigue-y symptoms. Will have to wait a few more days to really see whether I've pushed too hard...

Time passing

Well, the last 6 weeks have been filled up with an average of 17 hours a day bedrest, and an inability to do any exercise. The remaining hours are taken up with my brief work week, and a couple of family meals.

Luckily for me, the spectre of depression remains unrealised. Plus the severity of my fatigue means that despite eating more than usual and rarely moving, my weight remains steady, so I won't have that burden to deal with when I can ease back to a normal walking routine.

Annoyingly, I'm struggling to read books, with the brain fog crushing my concentration (I pretty much use all my mental energy on work), so it's been a diet of podcasts and rewatched DVDs.

Thus my excuse for no updates is portrayed, and I may once more return to my repose :)

Urgh

Well I've felt crappy all week, including having my second sick day of the year on Monday, but my usual Thursday dinner with family, plus today's lunch with Em and my first phone conversation of the year with B somehow make everything seem all right :)

Tomorrow I make another tentative attempt to return to exercise, after some less than positive short walks the past couple of weeks. This time it's some easygoing strength work and stretches, since apparently I'm now allergic to fresh air... Or the cold... Or whatever... ;)

Fiery sunset